Turning into Dad

Sad news came this week from a close cousin, informing me of the quiet passing of a favorite family member. Four sons were raised under the watchful eye (Proverbs 4:1) of our Uncle Bill, a man my sister and I knew as a soft-spoken, kind, thoughtful and hospitable southern gentleman. In the latter stages of life, Bill suffered the many indignities of Alzheimer’s, robbing those who knew him best of the things for which we had grown to love him most (Jeremiah 33:6). With fondness, we reminisced about the good times we shared with our closest cousins, now almost forty-plus years removed… summer visits to Grandma’s little white house, delicious meals prepared by her two daughters (many of which we devoured while seated at the “kids” table), long hours spent mimicking the Beatles in the basement and road trips in the station wagon on Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays. Time passes with tremendous societal change, yet the simplest joys at the core of our collective memory are cherished. As men, we see the resemblance to our own fathers manifested in small, subtle ways, but in celebrating Bill’s life, we pause to treasure the high and finer things of our fathers (Psalm 25:4), while laying aside any bad. As for me, of all that I might still become, I could do a whole lot worse… than turning into Dad.

Every other weekend

Three straight days of Thanksgiving feasts and a long weekend where family and friends gathered to share a meal and a moment are in the rearview mirror now. Plenty of food and football followed, but an interesting observation came upon noticing how truly blurred familial lines have become. Parents, grandparents, multiple marriages, step-children, half-brothers and sisters, the adopted, not-too-distant cousins, foster nieces and nephews all cast aside their blood lineage (Psalm 33:13) and morphed seamlessly into oversized clans without DNA definition. Pulling the loose ends together, you might describe those who willingly take on such challenges and responsibilities as “parents without borders.” Somehow, many couples are able to delicately balance all the expectations and make things work with plenty of patience, love, temperance, determination, hard work and good humor. There’s no doubt that God’s hand is evident when watching these diverse group dynamics in action. Given today’s startling divorce statistics, it becomes even more difficult to maintain a sense of belonging when children are shuffled from one house to the other, particularly during the holidays. Fortunately, the Holy Spirit is found in this season (Romans 5:5), shining His light of love on all who gather together, grateful for their place at the table, and blessing those who knowingly watch and understand. In the seasonal silence, the sound you hear may just be that of fences being mended and hearts being healed. All things are possible (Mark 10:27)…

Forever autumn

The first brisk breezes of fall blew across the Texas prairie last week and more are forecast for the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday. Signs are all around that the inevitable changing of seasons is upon us (Psalm 104:19): the once-brilliant summer sun fades earlier each day, birds in flying formation soar southward to distant tropical locales, leaves delicately change colors and tumble earthward, lying lightly atop a golden gown of autumn ground cover. Is there really beauty in darker days and winter winds (Daniel 2:21)? Closer observation yields a positive reply. The winter season requires retreat to the comfort of the family fireplace, enjoying the moments when friends gather to celebrate another annual accomplishment or simply marvel at how much God has brought us through during a challenging year (Genesis 28:15). While we may have wandered away from Him from time to time, He never leaves our side… or our hearts. The natural beauty of God’s creation is seen in everything in which there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven. To those who welcome warmth, fear not. Spring will return shortly. And to the fans of cooler weather, may your autumn be forever.

In it... not of it

The topic of earthly matters came up recently in a spirited discussion involving the role of God’s children. With all that’s going on around the globe, it’s not hard to see clear evidence that the planet is growing darker by the day. We know clinging to God in trying times offers the most security and peace, but the Father has different plans (Matthew 28:19-20), leading us out into the throngs of fallen saints and sinners where grace is most needed. He wants us to share His truth, bring hope to the hopeless and take the Light to all corners of creation until the lost are found (Romans 1:16). While it may be far easier and less painful to retreat to the sanctity of the Bible itself, making ourselves aware of the world around us, while standing firm and not succumbing to its temptations and evils, should be our personal crusade. The playground bully found strength through intimidation, instilling fear and threatening harm… until the point at which the weaker chose to no longer be pushed around. By standing up and facing the enemy (Acts 1:8), the inevitable confrontation, where calm words met unfounded anger and misdirected hostility, was never as dangerous as assumed. Jesus came to save His people, so we are compelled by his example to be involved. True, we are not like the world, but we can love it.

Photographs and memories

When it comes to moving or relocation, the ever-exhausting exercise always elicits mixed emotions. “Out with the old” takes on new meaning as earthly possessions are painstakingly packed in preparation for the sojourn to new surroundings. Of course, the inevitable questions arise – does this stay or go? Keep or toss? Do we really need something we haven’t touched or much less thought about since the last move (insert applicable number here) years ago? Close inspection of every box reveals another chapter of life’s history lived, another mile of the journey passed (Judges 18:6). An antique heirloom reminds you of an elderly relative. A dusty yearbook recalls a cherished high-school or college friendship. An old picture, its image faded and edges torn, captures a more innocent time, now fondly revisited. Each piece speaks to the moment in which it happened, allowing us to stop and remember the long ago as lovingly as we might the past weekend (Psalm 16:11). These visualizations are safely stowed away in our minds, yet may easily be forgotten unless we actively work to keep them firmly rooted in our consciousness. Such is the picture we must maintain of Jesus Christ (Hebrews 12:2) -- arms open, hands upheld and eyes on Heaven, calling his children to join him. In doing this, we’re already prepared for our final move… to the place He has promised.

Don't worry, be happy

“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own (Matthew 6:34).” Does it ever seem as if there are those who breeze through life without a care in the world, while others, perhaps subject to similar circumstances, constantly fuss and fret over even the smallest things? Best-selling authors tell us not to sweat the small stuff because doing so can lead to bigger problems. How people react to life’s daily slings and arrows, however, says a great deal about their individual ability to cope and deal with both seen and unseen pressures (Luke 12:25). A tightly-wound workaholic may come unglued as a fine detail goes unattended, while a more casual nine-to-fiver is set off by an extra assignment doled out at quitting time. In the home, life often mirrors the personality traits exhibited by its occupants… organized and structured or chaotic and spontaneous. Maintaining a balanced equilibrium can be challenging at best, but trying to control the uncontrollable is without question more tiring, frustrating and unhealthy in the long run (1 Peter 5:7). We’ve all seen the popular bumper stickers proudly proclaiming, “God is my co-pilot.” With due respect, I imagine the road ahead would be much smoother and more worry-free once we surrender the wheel, scoot over and let Him drive. Happy motoring.

Reelin' in the years

Turning fifty these days is not the celebrated milestone it used to be. In a society that endlessly debates the politically-charged issues of homelessness and healthcare for the elderly, yet culturally reveres youth and seemingly encourages and rewards unbridled exuberance, the forgotten folk found floating through the middle ages (Job 32:9) are often left wondering – hey, what about us? Where do we fit in? Even if fifty has become the new thirty, it’s never too late to consider one’s role in the Master Plan and realize that every contribution, no matter how great or small, makes a difference. We know that age is truly but a number and attitude is key when it comes to transitioning our energies from a fondness for worldly success to something of substantial significance. God guides the willing (Psalm 138:8), giving them everything they need to accomplish the task He has selected for them. Moses, after all, did his best work after reaching the ripe age of 80 (Isaiah 46:4). We deny ourselves many blessings by simply sitting on the sidelines, so don’t think that middle age is a half-full/half-empty proposition. By suiting up and getting involved, you’ll find fifty can be the beginning of an exhilarating life in Jesus Christ. Happy birthday, Sis – I love you!

True colors

Every generation has sought to carve out its own identity, to distinguish and define itself within the context of its times. For example, the greatest generation (those born between 1916 to the mid-1920s) fought World War II. The silent generation followed (1925-1945) and begat the baby boom generation (1945-1964), which gave us generation X (1965-1981). The “Me” generation, those born in the 70s and 80s, was known largely for its focus on self, believing that the needs of individuals were more important than the needs of others (Proverbs 11:25). Over time, it’s not hard to see the distancing and separation of man from the principles found in the Bible. Whereas commandments to focus on serving others (1 Corinthians 10:24) abound, mantras such as “Be yourself” and “Believe in yourself” run counter to Christian teaching. The situation may not be improving, as we continue to witness a growing emphasis on all things “i” (i.e. iPod, iTunes, iPhone, iPad and iMac), reflecting the cultural shifts of a modern, global society. People may say, “you can’t have it all,” but it hasn’t stopped them from trying to have it all. The material “all” is far less important, however, than the true “all” – having God, the Savior, as the spiritual center of your life (James 4:8). Can the “Me” generation become the “He” generation? It can, if you’re not afraid to be your true self, the self He created, and show your true colors – they are beautiful.

Give me wings

This Memorial Day weekend, Americans will honor the men and women who gave their lives during wartime, making the ultimate sacrifice, throughout this nation’s lengthy military history. A high price was paid by many, defending the freedoms and liberties upon which the founding fathers constructed the constitution of the United States. Causes worth defending, principles worth protecting. Heaven is filled with the courageous (Nehemiah 9:27) who took on mortal enemies and earned their stripes by walking in the faith that their heroic efforts would not go in vain. While we may never face the persecution that Jesus confronted during his time on earth, the spiritual battlefield is every bit as real as the fight on foreign soils (Job 34:22). As believers, we stand steadfast and confidently ask God for His provision as we suit up to wage war against sin and evil, both seen and unseen. In the grip of His glory and grace, angels at our side, we pay respect in silent tribute to those fallen soldiers, knowing that the promised day of final victory is coming (1 John 5:4). With salvation secure in you, Father, give me wings that I may fly to the freedom found in your magnificent kingdom.

Depending on you

Nothing in life is guaranteed (death and taxes notwithstanding), but things you can truly count on seem to be few and far between these days. The worldly grind contains ample supplies of upheaval and uncertainty that causes stress and worry in creatures of habit. Without grandparents, parents, a spouse or children, from where does the support of family emanate? Having a friend lift you up (Psalm 3:3) when you’re down can make competing in the rat race a bearable proposition. When dealing with a difficult situation at work or struggling with a personal addiction, who’s there by your side to offer encouragement and inspiration in overcoming the obstacle? In an increasingly wired world, there is a greater instance of isolation and disconnection from those who might help (Isaiah 51:6). When success does come in a chosen pursuit, how do you keep ego in check and stay grounded? Personal pride has always been the primary enemy of man’s natural balance and well-being (Luke 1:52). The good news is that no matter how much chaos and uncertainty swirls around us, there is always one source of security, comfort and peace – Jesus Christ. And on that, you can depend.

Sowin' love

“Sit up straight and mind your manners.” “Don’t eat so fast, no one is going to take it away from you.” “The years go by much faster the older you get.” I am reminded of these pearls of wisdom, along with many others, as I take a few quiet moments on this Mother’s Day to remember the impact, influence and inspiration my own mother provided during her too short life. It’s hard to believe she’s been gone over twenty years (Ecclesiastes 3:1), but the memories of our time together and the lessons learned remain firmly forged in my consciousness. Mary took a genuine interest in everything that mattered to me, regardless of its relative importance, and made time to listen. I may not have always followed her advice, but I’ve constantly tried to follow her example (Proverbs 1:8): be kind and considerate, help those in need, watch what you say, keep your promises and stay true to the unique person that God made you to be. Cancer might have robbed my mother of her physical body at 58, but there’s no question her spirit lives on in the hearts and minds of those for whom she cared most. The gardener will be pleased to know the shoots she nurtured years ago took root and are finally bearing fruit (John 15:4). Thank you, Mom, for sowing the seeds of love.

Here comes the sun

Given the advice of health experts and nutritionists, you would never think of starting your day without a good breakfast. After all, research has shown that after sleeping, the body needs and requires the appropriate fuel to assure peak performance. Beginning each day with a few quiet moments of prayer (1 Kings 8:28) and reflection are equally vital to one’s spiritual agility. It’s not that God needs to hear from us on a regular basis, but that we need to be still and listen to Him before the sounds of the day overwhelm our senses. The world throws an incredible number of distractions and temptations our way in order to steal focus from our primary mission – following Jesus’ lead and fulfilling the plan that Our Redeemer has uniquely designed for us (Jeremiah 10:23). With each new dawn, we must be refreshed and nourished in order to tackle the task at hand with energy and enthusiasm. Starting the morning off on the right foot in earnest prayer (Psalm 17:6) will guarantee we never walk alone. As my father often told me across the breakfast table when a full schedule of chores and activities were waiting, “eat up, son, we’re burning daylight.”

That's what faith must be

Rabbits, marshmallows, egg dyes, haircuts, new Sunday outfits… the worldly signs of Easter signal springtime. In reality, Easter is not about a bunny. It’s about something darker and far more significant – the final act of the Passion, in which Jesus, following his death on the cross at the hands of the Romans, rose from his tomb after three days to rejoin his Father in heaven (1 Peter 1:3). For even the most devoted believers, the story detailed in the Bible strains the brain as truly unbelievable. Yet, therein lies the paradox: the act of resurrection may indeed be impossible to believe, but belief in heaven requires it. If our earthly shell disintegrates, what will comprise our heavenly form (1 Corinthians 15:40)? And, if we don’t have bodies in heaven, what kind of heaven would it be? Those who suggest immortality of the soul alone might find it difficult to enjoy the promised pleasures of eternal life without any senses. Is the capability to believe in such a supernatural event as Christ’s resurrection a special act of God’s grace? We may not know what God has in store for us in His heaven (Psalm 73:25), but recognizing His Son’s resurrection and believing the Truth that it really happened makes Easter even more meaningful.

No place that far

“Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms; I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me (John 14:1-3).” In the last days prior to his crucifixion, Jesus comforted his troubled disciples with this wonderful promise. Not anxious to see him leave and having accepted his invitation to “follow me,” the disciples had spent the three years of Christ’s earthly ministry by his side, taking in his teachings, witnessing miracles and learning by his compassionate example how to love one another (1 Peter 3:8). Putting others first is not an instinctive human quality, but serving those in need does yield rich rewards. Jesus knew his time on earth was coming to an end, yet he cared enough for those closest to him to make sure they clearly understood his word, giving his personal assurance that he would never leave them or forsake them (Deuteronomy 31:8). We have that same security and peace as believers, knowing our eternal place is being prepared just as he promised. While we can’t reach out and touch heaven, we can know with certainty that such a place is never too far away when the Spirit of God lives within our hearts.

One friend

When it comes to articulating affairs of the heart, you often find people on opposite ends of the spectrum. For some, Valentine’s Day is a time to express feelings of love with cards, flowers, chocolates and candy kisses. For others, it’s a time to share similar sentiments without all the manufactured accoutrements. Either way, telling others how you feel about them is always a good thing (Proverbs 16:24) and you don’t need a Valentine’s Day to do so. Any time is the right time to offer reassuring thoughts with not only loved ones, but with friends as well. Take a minute to acknowledge and recognize those who understand you and know you inside out. Thank those who help keep you together and believe, without a doubt, that you can move mountains. On the two-way street that is mankind’s mutual journey through life, such support and encouragement helps build bonds, forge friendships and strengthen the ties that bind (Acts 4:32). And, while your heart is open wide, tell God how much you love Him -- not because He needs to hear it, but because you want to (1 Corinthians 8:3). Having hundreds of friends on Facebook is nice enough, but if you were to have only one friend left, you’ll want it to be The One.

The gift

With the major milestone holidays (Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s) safely in the rear-view mirror, it’s time to register appropriate appreciation for all that has been given (Ephesians 5:20). During the “season,” friends and family gathered while fun, food and fellowship ensued in a whirlwind of activity that would challenge even the most astute schedule planners. Amidst such hoopla, was a quiet moment of reflection even possible? It most certainly should have been (Psalm 107:1). There were ample opportunities to offer prayers of gratitude for daily provision, the strength and stability of families and the promise of a fresh start. With so many blessings in this life, any emptiness, real or perceived, can only be filled in one way… by God. It is His touch, through the Holy Spirit, that sets us free to become the individual He expressly designed each of us to be. We know that it’s never about the number of presents under the proverbial tree, but truly about the treasures of the heart. The only dream in this life that matters can come true when we are loved by our Father in Heaven, a love He gives to us in abundance when we accept His Son as Lord and Savior. Thank Him for the Gift (2 Corinthians 9:15).